Is that Elvis?

I’m a People Watcher….

In traveling around China, I see thousands and thousands of people. I’m a people watcher. Watching people is the only thing you can do while waiting hours and hours for planes, trains, and donkey carts.

Some people look like Chinese versions of other people. Some look like combinations of people… like this one. If you mixed Mike Wolf with Jimmy Fallon, you might get this Chinese guy I saw at the train station. Continue reading

The Quanzhou Hotel Gate

It’s rainy season here in southern China. The air is filled with a misty haze that isn’t quite rain and isn’t quite fog. I’m told that it’s been like this for two weeks straight and is likely to continue for another two.

Another factory host promptly arrives at the hotel at 8 am. Another day…. another long drive to a place not served by rail or air. Today’s drive will be 4 hours each way, with 3 factories to see. It will be a long day.

The hotel is a sort of compound, with a guard shack and gate. The gate is a “railroad track” type barrier that goes up to permit cars to pass. Coming or going involves stopping at the gate, a verbal exchange, taking or giving back a credit card sized pass, more verbal exchange… and then the raising of the gate.

In China, this ritual is accomplished by at least 4 men. It is their job and life’s work to operate this gate, at this hotel. They are dressed in a quasi-uniform, perhaps suggesting they are military but they are not. It’s all about order, rank, and procedure.

One man occupies the guard shack. He is in charge of giving out and taking the little pass. He no doubt is required to record all visitors on a 3 part form separated by carbon paper. The form probably contains a name, perhaps a company or business purpose. At the end of the day, he is required to make sure he accounts for each pass. The carbon copies are separated, summarized, and one copy is sent to a central warehouse in Beijing. I’ll bet it is a huge warehouse.

Another man works the gate. The control to the gate is not in the guard shack, that would be too easy. This man gets the nod of approval from the guard shack man and he dutifully raises and lowers the gate. He does it with intent and purpose…. every day… at that hotel.

The remaining two men are a bit of a mystery. My time in China has taught me that one of them is probably a  supervisor, whose job is to make sure the other three operate the gate according to the 52 page training manual on gate opening and closing procedures.

The 4th man, I’m guessing, is either an apprentice gate opener… or just a spare guy, on hand in case one of the others has to piss or is off sick.

In China, this is how you keep 2.5 billion people employed. You replicate this same redundant process for every job possible.

Imagine someone’s life’s work is to be on the gate team at the Quanzhou Hotel. Can you imagine the conversation at home?

“So, Chan… how was your day?” Asked wife Suzie as she prepared the rice and noodle dinner. Chan replies “It was very interesting today. We had 48 visitors, many foreigners.”

Suzie: “Wow, that was a busy day Chan. Were any interesting?” Chan: “You know I can’t divulge details of my job, Suzie”

“I know Chan, forgive me… please don’t tell the central committee that I asked” Suzie pleaded.

And so it goes in China.

Friday in China – Part 1

Today’s writing will consist of two parts. Part 1 is my day up until lunch. Part 2, deserving of its own narrative, is Lunch.

My mission on this trip was to checkout a new factory. I awoke at my normal Chinese time of 2:30 am, after four and a half hours of blissful sleep. My daily ritual began by boiling water for coffee. In the Chinese water pot, a full pot of water takes about 40 seconds to boil, roughly twice the amount of time it takes to melt your travel iron.  Continue reading

The “Wet Toe”

I want to caution all about a little known but persistently present danger in China, India, Bangladesh and a few other places I’ve been.

Until today, I thought this danger was limited to the bathroom, but now I find that it can strike anywhere in a foreign hotel room.   The condition I’m describing will hereinafter be referred to as….
The Wet Toe…

Continue reading

Three Star Hotel

This is your first trip into the bowels of China. You need a shower, having spent the last 24 hours on flights, in lines, waiting, eating bad airline food, and checking your watch. Are we there yet? Finally, you’ve arrived and have been delivered to your hotel.

You are very impressed upon entering the factory city’s best 3 Star Chinese hotel. You’re amazed at the marble… floor to ceiling… impeccably clean and polished to a high luster. The young bell boy struggles to carry your over-packed suitcase & briefcase as he leads you to your deluxe, $45 room. He knows that “westerners” may tip him 10-20 rmb which will double his wage for the day…. Who needs 9th grade, he thinks. Continue reading